Letting Go of Pain

Holding onto the pain of being hurt is like standing in the rain after someone locked you outside. When they realize this and come to let you in, apologize, and invite you back, you choose to stay outside. Not because you can't come in, but because you want them to feel your pain through your suffering.

You could let go of this pain, but instead, you hold onto it. Over time, it accumulates and deepens. Standing in the rain provides a tangible reason for your suffering, but the real pain lies within—unresolved and unaddressed.

You hold onto the surface pain because it’s easier to face than the deeper hurt that requires true forgiveness. You may believe this pain protects you, that forgiveness would lower your guard and make you vulnerable to being hurt again. But avoiding pain only creates more pain.

We must choose to step into the unknown, let down our armor, forgive, and love—not because others deserve it, but because it aligns with our values. Loving someone doesn’t mean becoming a doormat. It means articulating boundaries, needs, and expectations, and respecting others’ as well.

We can love people who cross our boundaries, but we don’t need to engage with them until they learn to respect us. Connection is vital to our humanity—so valuable it’s worth risking hurt and learning to repair ruptures.

To be truly seen, heard, and valued is the greatest gift we can offer each other.